The link between our health and our tweets!

I just came across Michelle Gielan’s book “Broadcasting Happiness” and was really interested to read the following:

“And as you’ve seen throughout this book, our communication patterns are predictive of a range of business, educational, and health outcomes. In a recent study conducted by my brilliant friends at the University of Pennsylvania, they have been able to predict levels of heart disease in a community based upon the tweets coming from people living there. By assessing language patterns that reflected strained relationships and negative emotions (especially anger) coming from local Twitter users, the team was able to predict levels of heart disease better than an existing ten-point model that used information such as demographics and health risk factors, including diabetes, hypertension, and obesity. Language expression on Twitter might be a better predictive medical tool than questionnaires given to people at the doctor’s office!
Let’s get really practical. Here are several examples of shifting-the-focus questions that you can use to greatly improve your broadcast and its ripple effects at home and at work.”

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Do you realize what she is saying! What we broadcast on Twitter is a better predictor of our risk for heart disease than the traditional medical exam. If what we say and the conversations that we feed are a better indicator of the health of our heart than our body weight or blood pressure… then we better start a complaint-free diet!

YES, the words that come out of our mouth and the ones that we broadcast on social media (or around the coffee machine at work) have an impact on our health. They also have a huge impact on how we navigate our lives! If we broadcast lack, fear, and limitation then we experience what we express – lack, fear and limitation – and days after days we go to bed at night feeling empty and powerless.

The good news is that we can totally change this habit we have of complaining all the time. Hundreds of people have done it and they shared with me how amazing their lives are now. By learning to cultivate another conversation with our life we start to see our resources and all the possibilities that it is offering us. We get out of our draining victim position and we start to fuel our lives.

When we learn to broadcast a “higher” conversation with our life, we can experience a “higher” life.

You can join the  “I quit complaining” Facebook group anytime. It’s free and it’s fun!

©2016

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

Give yourself permission to recharge your batteries!

Summer or not, many of us don’t get to go on a long vacation… but we can take time for a getaway and even make a habit of it!

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In his book, The Charge,* Brendon Burchard talks about, among other things, the importance of seeking challenges that will help you live life to its fullest.

It will come as no surprise that I am an advocate of many topics in his book. Following my 21 days “I Quit Complaining Challenge” (in French “J’arrête de râler”), I decided to undertake other challenges, such as 21 days of drinking vegetable juice for breakfast, 21 days in dresses, 21 days to celebrate, 21 days without media, 21 days of sit-ups…

One of the challenges in Burchard’s book that grabbed my attention is the  “90 days getaway challenge”. This challenge consists of planning a getaway alone, or as a couple, every 90 days to recharge our batteries and reconnect with ourselves. There’s no need anymore to wait for official “vacation”! Whoohoo!

When I read about this idea my heart started to sing!!! Take a getaway every 90 days to recharge your batteries. (Your cousin’s wedding across the country doesn’t count as a getaway.) A getaway for a day, a weekend, or a week (without the kids), to disconnect from daily life, without any phone or emails… just taking a little time for ourselves!

Take a little time to try something new and different. For instance, discover a new city, dive into a new book, start a new activity, participate in a program to reconnect with yourself (a spiritual retreat, some coaching, or the  Wake Up! seminar!)

It’s your turn:

  • What would you do if you could take off for a day, or a few days alone or with your spouse, to recharge your batteries? Make a list of all the things that would do you good, bring you serenity and help your growth. (Be careful not to censure yourself, make a list of everything that makes YOUR heart sing!)
  • Take a look at your calendar and schedule dates for your 4 upcoming getaways in the next 12 months (one every 3 months). Have fun with it! Dream!
  • Take time to plan with your spouse the logistics of your getaway (budget, childcare) to make this project a reality. If need be, start a special “getaway piggy bank” to help finance your projects.

Happy getaways!

Love & Respect,

Christine Lewicki

©2016

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

6 steps to communicate so that you can be heard

A few months ago I wrote an article titled: Learning to express our needs and frustrations differently.part 1 and part 2

Today I want to share with you a visual that I have created to remind myself of this process. I printed it, taped it to my fridge and I am using it every day.

Because sometimes we do have something to say to the people around us. We do need them to help us meet our needs. But it’s not always easy to communicate. The more important the need is, the more chances we have to slip into our blaming and complaining habit and let’s face it it’s exhausting to complain and not feel heard.

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©2016

Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

I am not a victim!

We are the victim when it comes to our boss, our job (or our lack of employment), the political crisis, our spouse, our family… you’ll notice that we often talk about ourselves as victims. We expend a lot of energy pointing out it’s not our fault – it’s the other person’s fault (our spouse, our children, our boss, our colleague, the President, the administration, service providers) we are in this mess!

I found out for myself that I had managed to develop a talent for pointing the finger at the culprits in my life. In a way, it’s fun to be a victim because if the others are wrong then I am necessarily right. If the other person is guilty then it is up to him to find a solution to the problem, not me. But in the end, what this means (annoyingly enough) is that if the blame is squarely on the other person, I am powerless to do anything.

I have the power to choose to not be a victim! (2)

It is true that it is often easier to be a victim than someone who acts, but when I decide that I am the victim I no longer have the power to take control of my life. In the end, it’s me who suffers the real consequences. Wouldn’t you agree?

When I cast myself as a victim I choose to give my power to the person who is supposedly “guilty.” By pointing the finger I make them the master of my destiny. I realized one day that I was able to refuse to function this way and I have no doubt that you can as well.

We talk to our friends, our relatives, our colleagues, about our lives because we need to interact and share our problems and, yes, that is an inherent part of love and friendship, as are compassion and support… All that is good. I am not saying that we cannot discuss our problems and share our suffering, far from it. But we have the power to REFUSE to cast ourselves as victims of anything, or anyone.

This is one of the biggest revelations of my life, that I was casting myself as a victim and I could easily choose not to.

I think it’s amazing to realize that we have that choice!

By looking at how we talk about ourselves and our problems, we have the choice to either give our power to the so-called culprits… Or not.

Imagine, if you are a no longer a victim, if others are not guilty… Then anything is possible! No?

©2016

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.comand visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

What is Your Recurrent Complaint?

What is you recurrent complaint? Is there a complaint that comes out of your mouth more often than others. This one is almost automatic, it comes back almost every day, sometimes even many times during the same day, or even first thing upon awakening.

For me, I found that my recurrent complaint has been “I am too fat”, or “I am not making enough money”, or ” I spend too much time on my emails”.

As soon as I decided to embark on this journey to quit complaining, I realized that I had to start to do something different in my life if I wanted to get a different result. As Einstein says it very well “insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result”.

Insanity Eisntein

So, I decided to replace insanity with discipline. If I wanted to stop complaining about my body I had to do something every day toward getting fit or else I should let go of my expectation to have a fit body ! Simple, right ?

We complain when there is gap between what we expect and  our reality. The most powerful way to reduce suffering and thus the complaining that goes with it is to reduce this gap. Either we work on improving  our reality, or we work on letting go of our expectations!

That’s when discipline becomes our best friend. Instead of seeing discipline as a constraint we start to see it as our key to freedom and fulfillment. Setting free of our frustrations, dealing with them one day at a time to create the life that we truly want.

You cannot be happy without discipline. In fact, if you want to measure the level of happiness in your life, measure your level of discipline. You will never have more happiness than you have discipline. The two are directly linked to each other. If you want to increase the level of fulfillment and happiness in a certain area of your life, increase your level of discipline in that area of your life. On the other hand, if you find that you are altogether too happy too much of the time, you may want to think about decreasing the level of discipline in your life. Discipline and happiness are directly linked.”   ~ Matthew Kelly from Perfectly Yourself

Love & Respect,

Christine Lewicki

© 2015

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit” on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com

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LEARNING TO LET GO OF OUR NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

Katie Byron, in her process of inquiry called The Work (www.thework.com), demonstrates that a thought is harmless unless we believe it. This is why she invites us to question ourselves in order to distance ourselves from what we think is “true”.

Doing this, we liberate ourselves from our resistance, we stop to mentally oppose ourselves to what is happening, thus we can better accept it and focus on finding a solution whether we are faced with an accident, loss of employment, a problem on the road, being late, health problems…

It’s not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering” says Byron. When we allow ourselves to complain, we let our negative thoughts become real. Through our complaints, they enter our conversations, our relationships, our daily life…and little by little they become our life, our identity. We end up believing them!

letting go

It is important, to successfully complete this 21 days challenge to Quit Complaining, to distance ourselves from our complaints and not let them invade our being. We have to learn to let go, to question their appropriateness. However, I can assure you that we aren’t trying to suppress them. I am very well aware that it is practically impossible to prevent them from manifesting themselves in us and this isn’t the topic of this blog.

Our brain is a very active organ that thinks, thinks, thinks all day long. Our thoughts come and go without us being aware of it. They manifest themselves in our brain a thousand at a time and we can’t prevent them from doing so. Some are positive, some are negative. And at the end, this isn’t really important because they don’t hurt us. This is why in this challenge, complaining in your head doesn’t count. We just let the complain go by and keep going about our business.

The problem is when we start getting attached to our thoughts, to give them meaning and to express them through complaints. From that point on, we are embedding negative thoughts in our life. We anchor them. This challenge, however, invites us to find a healthy space to fully live our negative thoughts and get rid of them.

After that, the important thing is to learn how to let our negative thoughts come and go without disrupting our life and becoming attached to our frustration!

The idea here is not to deny our emotions. In the contrary, it is important to allow ourselves to feel our emotions. But after that it is necessary to let go, to not get attached to our negative thoughts, to not cling on to them or give them life through our conversations…by complaining!

It is true that sometimes we really have a way of rehashing the same worries. Our brain then works like a scratched record. It repeats and repeats and repeats itself almost all day. It’s stuck on complaints mode.

To discharge your frustrations, you can write in a journal, play a sport, take a walk around the block, talk to a friend in a constructive manner or see a specialized doctor if you think you need professional help.

I wish you a great day !

Love and Respect,

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Christine Lewicki

© 2015

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Certified Business Coach, Speaker, MasterMind Group Leader and Bestselling Author. She is committed to help people quit complaining and  become entrepreneurs of their lives ,  one {im}perfect action at a time. You can download your FREE I Quit Complaining Starter Kit  HERE”

Stop The Negative Voice in Our Head!

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“My words create my reality. If I change the message I have the power to change my life” Christine Lewicki

The little voices in our heads or the chatterbox…we all have it and it accompanies us everyday.

There’s the voice of enthusiasm full of projects, ideas. The voice that encourages us to grow and discover. It’s the little voice that says ” what if…”

And there’s the voice of fear that drags us down and kills our joy. The one that stops and prevents us from moving forward. It’s the little voice that says: ” I can’t do it …I am not capable…”

These two little voices or chatterbox live inside us and they are especially active in the creative, curious and entrepreneur types.

The voice of fear is often powerful and takes up lots of room in our lives. It often gets on our nerves, frustrates and gives us a bad image of ourselves. We’d like it to shut it up but to no avail.

Do you know the book called “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway” by Susan Jeffers ? It’s an excellent book that encourages us to forge ahead with our projects beyond our fears.

Today, I’d like to invite you to consider and treat the voice of fear like your ally. I’d like you to ask yourself the following question: “How is this fear voice seeking my good?” What is it trying to tell you?

Could it be that this little fear voice is telling you are not ready,that the timing is not quite right… Take a good listen to hear what it is trying to tell you (versus limiting you) Sometimes fear is telling us that we are going through something very important for us. If we feel afraid it simply means we are living something important. It doesn’t necessarily mean that we have to stop and take a step back but on the contrary forge ahead and go forward because it matters. (with caution).

Once you’ve identified the messages, tune in again to the voice of enthusiasm and feed off it as soon as possible. Can you see how these two voices can become partners for your well-being and your growth?

I’d like to invite you to take notice of these two voices and really decipher what they are telling you… play and adjust the volume! Most important seek to identify the message of the little voice that limits you and replace the message with a stronger more positive message!

Love & Respect,

Christine Lewicki

© 2015

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit” on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com

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Interview “I Quit Complaining and Bitching!” for Soul.Am

A lovely interview by Julie Hasson for Soul.Am on the topic of the 21 Day Challenge and how it all started  for “I Quit Complaining and Bitching! “ by Christine Lewicki, bestselling author

 

How is your Quit Complaining Challenge going?  Please share your comments on the blog or on the  Facebook page too!

 

Love and Respect,

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Christine Lewicki

© 2015

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit” on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com

Stop Complaining and Just Do IT!

Stop Complaining!  Let go! Just Do it! We KNOW what we need to do to be happier in our lives. We have “Haha!” moments, intuitive insights but then the next day or sometimes even the following hour, doubt takes over and we don’t follow through on our good intentions! We KNOW what we need to do but somehow we find a thousand excuses not to start and we procrastinate!

I can’t do it today, I already have too many things going on, I’ll start tomorrow!” In the end, we let other things take over and watch our lives go by as a spectator. The hardest part is to CHOOSE to live a better life and START to do IT! The “IT” that we want to do does not yet have a place in our busy lives and starting means to make room for it. Choosing to do “IT” instead of answering all the emails, surfing the web, having another cup of tea, starting a load of laundry or watching something on TV etc..

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I am always surprised to notice how my emails can become much more important than what I KNOW will contribute to my life. Sometimes I just want to shout ” Stop sending  me emails!” “I have a life to live!” (hummmmm…am I complaining, now?)

I am becoming more and more aware of all those times when I want to give to others before giving to myself. I have important (or not) emails in my box or comments on my blog and I have the urge to reply right away and I end up choosing to give “to myself”, later.

Today, I feel that I must focus on my well-being and happiness FIRST in my life. My biggest responsibility in life is to take care of me. In doing so, I will be nourished, inspired, happy , in good health to better ( and not more) help others and contribute.

“What” I want to do personally at this point in my life, is to create a bigger discipline in my life and a daily ritual which will contribute to my well-being . This “IT’, I’ve been thinking about it for the last 2 months and it is time that I turn this “idea” into a “reality” because in the long run just thinking about it and thinking I’ll get to do it one day , well it makes my head spin! ….

What is  this “IT” that you’ve  been procrastinating about in your life?

Love and Respect,

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© 2015

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author. She is committed  to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit”  on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com

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