The link between our health and our tweets!

I just came across Michelle Gielan’s book “Broadcasting Happiness” and was really interested to read the following:

“And as you’ve seen throughout this book, our communication patterns are predictive of a range of business, educational, and health outcomes. In a recent study conducted by my brilliant friends at the University of Pennsylvania, they have been able to predict levels of heart disease in a community based upon the tweets coming from people living there. By assessing language patterns that reflected strained relationships and negative emotions (especially anger) coming from local Twitter users, the team was able to predict levels of heart disease better than an existing ten-point model that used information such as demographics and health risk factors, including diabetes, hypertension, and obesity. Language expression on Twitter might be a better predictive medical tool than questionnaires given to people at the doctor’s office!
Let’s get really practical. Here are several examples of shifting-the-focus questions that you can use to greatly improve your broadcast and its ripple effects at home and at work.”

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Do you realize what she is saying! What we broadcast on Twitter is a better predictor of our risk for heart disease than the traditional medical exam. If what we say and the conversations that we feed are a better indicator of the health of our heart than our body weight or blood pressure… then we better start a complaint-free diet!

YES, the words that come out of our mouth and the ones that we broadcast on social media (or around the coffee machine at work) have an impact on our health. They also have a huge impact on how we navigate our lives! If we broadcast lack, fear, and limitation then we experience what we express – lack, fear and limitation – and days after days we go to bed at night feeling empty and powerless.

The good news is that we can totally change this habit we have of complaining all the time. Hundreds of people have done it and they shared with me how amazing their lives are now. By learning to cultivate another conversation with our life we start to see our resources and all the possibilities that it is offering us. We get out of our draining victim position and we start to fuel our lives.

When we learn to broadcast a “higher” conversation with our life, we can experience a “higher” life.

You can join the  “I quit complaining” Facebook group anytime. It’s free and it’s fun!

©2016

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

An electric shock!

Somehow, subconsciously, when we {bitch} and complain we hope that we will perhaps cause an “electric shock” in others.

an-eletric-shock

We think that by showing our annoyance in our tone, by demonstrating (sometimes just by innuendo) that it is their fault, and by exaggerating a bit (or a lot!), then they will understand that they must change or that they have to do something to solve the problem.

Yet it is proven over and over again that someone put in the position of “culprit” has no desire to cooperate!

That person feels threatened and won’t consider our words or our needs. We hoped to rally them to our cause but instead, they end up fleeing or, even worse, attacking us.

©2016

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

The power of Habit!

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“Hundreds of habits influence our days—they guide how we get dressed in the morning, talk to our kids, and fall asleep at night; they impact what we eat for lunch, how we do business, and whether we exercise or have a beer after work. Each of them has a different cue and offers a unique reward. Some are simple and others are complex, drawing upon emotional triggers and offering subtle neurochemical prizes. But every habit, no matter its complexity, is malleable. The most severely addicted alcoholics can become sober. The most dysfunctional companies can transform themselves. A high school dropout can become a successful manager. However, to modify a habit, you must decide to change it. You must consciously accept the hard work of identifying the cues and rewards that drive the habit’s routines, then find alternatives and support. You must know you have control and be self-conscious enough to use it—and every chapter in this book is devoted to illustrating a different aspect of why that control is real.”

—Charles Duhigg from The Power of Habit

When I decided to start my 21 Day Challenge to Quit Complaining I did it because I realized that I was constantly “resisting” my days.  I was not conscious of this dynamic because the resistance was mild but it was always there and it showed up in those complaints. I would come home and complain about the mess in my house, the dirty dishes in the sink, about other cars on the road (bad driving is like bad breath, you notice it only when it is someone else’s!) I was complaining about my emails or about my Internet provider – all day long without being aware of it, I was resisting. It was a habit!

I did not want to realize on my deathbed that I had spent my entire life resisting it. I wanted to savor this life – with the messy house, with the demanding kids, with the emails… I wanted to create a new relationship with my (not always very sexy) life.

I undertook a challenge because I wanted to set myself free from this habit.  I knew that having the “intention” to embrace my everyday frustrations with a positive attitude was not going to be enough; I knew that the next day I was going to get caught up in the spiral of daily routines and that I was simply going to forget my good intention.

I wanted to train my brain and create new habits, habits that would set me free from falling into “victim mode,” habits that would allow me to be more present and more responsible in my life.

Can you identify negative habits that get in the way of fully enjoying your life?

If complaining is one of them, I invite you to start the challenge today!

You can read in more detail about the beginning of my journey with the challenge here. The challenge may take you 21 days or even a year, but I guarantee it will change your life!

©2016

Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com . visit her Instagram page and  her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

The tragedies of our lives!

Have you ever noticed how sometimes we can transform a simple frustration into a gigantic tragedy?

Something doesn’t happen as planned:

# Our train is late and we are going to miss an important appointment

# We have to pay more taxes than we thought

# Our employer is reorganizing the company and our responsibilities or schedule have to change

# We already have a million things to do and another task falls on our desk at work.

We constantly have to change our plans, to adapt, to make efforts and to not resist what is happening to us. Our frustration transforms itself in worldwide tragedy. The problem gets so big that we feel threatened.

I remember this happened to me. I had a big day of work ahead of me, multiple phone appointments with my clients. My coaching work happens on the phone 98% and my clients are in the United States, in Canada, Europe, Asia; they can be anywhere in the world. That being said, I use an Internet system to communicate to avoid massive bills. This morning, as I was turning on my computer at 8:40 am, I noticed that my Internet connection wasn’t working properly and kept going offline…and my first phone appointment was already 20 minutes late! I started to panic and I heard myself say: “They are going to kill my business if it keeps going this way if my connection doesn’t work it’ll cost me a fortune.” My words were clearly exaggerated.
This tendency to overreact happens to all of us, sometimes, and too often to some of us. We find ourselves saying things like “ This is killing me”,“They are so damn stupid”, “They can’t do anything right”, “What a bunch of incompetent”, “This is a disaster”.

Love and Respect,

christine-signature

Christine Lewicki

© 2015

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

I am NOT a Victim!

When we feel like a victim, victimized by our boss, our job, (or lack of job), the economic crisis, politics, spouse, our family, we tend to victimize ourselves on our own especially in our conversations. We waste a lot of energy blaming others and not taking any responsibility. It’s everybody’s fault  – our spouse,  children, boss, colleagues, the President, the administration, service providers  – and the list goes on and on…. and on! We have nothing to do with it!

Pointing finger

Personally, I discovered that I became quite an expert and developed  a talent to point the fingers at all the guilty people in my life. In some ways, it’s pleasant to be a victim because if the other person is wrong then it must means I am right!  If the other person is guilty then it’s his or her responsibility to find a solution  to the problem, it’s not mine! But in the end , what  I found  very troublesome lying just under the surface is that if I accuse the other person then it really implies that I am powerless and can do nothing about the situation!

Sometimes it’s actually easier to be a victim than to have the courage to stand up and take some action. When I act like a victim, I am in fact really giving away all my power to be able to create my own reality. In the end, I am the one who will suffer the consequences.

When I position myself as a victim in my conversations, I am making  a choice  to surrender my power to all the “guilty people” in my life. I point the finger and put my life and destiny in their  hands. One day I understood that I had the power to refuse pointing the finger  and  take full responsibility for my feelings and actions. Everyone can do it  too!

In our conversations when we talk to our friends, family or colleagues about our life,  we all have a need to open-up and share our problems .  Close friends and  our loved ones can provide this safety net of  non-judgemental compassion and support.  I am not saying that we cannot talk about our worries or problems, but we have to  remember that we also  have the power to REFUSE to play the role of a victim

This was a great eye-opener for me in my life! I  became aware that I was the one who victimized myself in my conversations and that in the end I had the choice to stop doing it.  I realized that when I act like a victim, I am actually giving away my power to others and empowering the guilty ones.  It’s not my fault  therefore I can do nothing about it and I am powerless to find a solution to my problem.

 It’s a great feeling when we become aware that we can choose not  to give away  our power! By changing what we say in our conversations , we can choose to empower the guilty ones or not.

Imagine, if you no longer point the finger and play the victim , if others are not guilty either then everything becomes possible, doesn’t it?

What are your thoughts?

Love and Respect,

christine-signature

Christine Lewicki

© 2014

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“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit”  on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com

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